Evidently, back in their world, Jack's daughter has special powers that can be enhanced by something called 'eridium' which is either a performance-enhancing drug or a rare element. I'm not sure which. During her last few years of life, Jack kept giving it to her, until she was dependent on it to live. About the *best* interpretation there is that he wanted to bring out her full potential--*but you don't do that by hooking her on space steroids.*
That's the horrible part, Carly. I know him enough that I can probably guess the bullshit excuses he gave himself to justify it.
And no, the worst thing I ever did... wasn't that. I mean, it *was* harming the people who were in my care and were my responsibility and doing it in a way that benefited myself... but it wasn't *my idea* to do it--I was under orders from our Keeper, ones that I couldn't disobey--and there weren't long term health consequences for them! I mean, it was still an awful, heinous act and I don't know why they forgave me enough to take me with them when they all escaped... *but still*. Not as bad as that.
And yes, it's very much over. (And to be fair to Emet-Selch, he didn't know his whole Emperor Solus routine would fuck with my head so badly.)
I just meant-- Hm. That I know, more or less, my badness level (as Lilo would call it) and since it's unusually high for someone my size, if I know someone is not a good person, I assume they're roughly as much of a bad person as I am. And trust them not to do anything *I* would consider to be unacceptable.
Only Jack *did*. And I'm so *angry*, Carly. I could deal with him being self-centered and insensitive and shit, but not knowing that he harmed his *own daughter*. You're supposed to keep your people *safe*, for fuck's sake.
That said, please don't feel bad that you didn't realize that Jack was capable of that shit either. I really do feel like people in general use themselves as reference points for other people's capabilities. So if you've got lines you won't cross, you'll expect them not to cross them too. (And it's not like Jack's walking around marinating in his own guilt, so that wouldn't tip you off either.)
So whatever *you've* done (and I suppose I should admit to myself that it's unlikely that your hads were clean coming here either, hard as it is for me to believe it)... I think I can safely say that you're a bit better than Jack too.
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That's the horrible part, Carly. I know him enough that I can probably guess the bullshit excuses he gave himself to justify it.
And no, the worst thing I ever did... wasn't that. I mean, it *was* harming the people who were in my care and were my responsibility and doing it in a way that benefited myself... but it wasn't *my idea* to do it--I was under orders from our Keeper, ones that I couldn't disobey--and there weren't long term health consequences for them! I mean, it was still an awful, heinous act and I don't know why they forgave me enough to take me with them when they all escaped... *but still*. Not as bad as that.
And yes, it's very much over. (And to be fair to Emet-Selch, he didn't know his whole Emperor Solus routine would fuck with my head so badly.)
I just meant-- Hm. That I know, more or less, my badness level (as Lilo would call it) and since it's unusually high for someone my size, if I know someone is not a good person, I assume they're roughly as much of a bad person as I am. And trust them not to do anything *I* would consider to be unacceptable.
Only Jack *did*. And I'm so *angry*, Carly. I could deal with him being self-centered and insensitive and shit, but not knowing that he harmed his *own daughter*. You're supposed to keep your people *safe*, for fuck's sake.
That said, please don't feel bad that you didn't realize that Jack was capable of that shit either. I really do feel like people in general use themselves as reference points for other people's capabilities. So if you've got lines you won't cross, you'll expect them not to cross them too. (And it's not like Jack's walking around marinating in his own guilt, so that wouldn't tip you off either.)
So whatever *you've* done (and I suppose I should admit to myself that it's unlikely that your hads were clean coming here either, hard as it is for me to believe it)... I think I can safely say that you're a bit better than Jack too.